It’s not a bad start, but it brings us to Common Error #1: beginning the essay by introducing oneself, instead of introducing the story, AKA, starting too broad. Ramya begins by trying to tell us who she is in a big, introductory, throat-clearing way, instead of choosing a specific route into who she is. It’s sweet that she’s small, but there’s a lot in here that we don’t need: we don’t need her height, nor do we need to know that she used to get the games in one particular way or another. We just need to know that she’s at the bar.
If you haven’t experienced a “big” failure, another angle to take would be to discuss smaller, repeated failures that are either linked or similar thematically. For example, if you used to stutter or get nervous in large social groups, you could discuss the steps you took to find a solution. Even if you don’t have a massive foundational challenge to write about, a recurring challenge can translate to a powerful essay topic, especially if the steps you took to overcome this repeated failure help expose your character.
My father left when I was one year old and I will soon be turning 17; I did the math and found that for about 5900 days he has neglected me. He was able to sleep 5900 nights without knowing whether or not I was dead or alive. Even though he’s been gone for 5900 days, my life did not get put on hold. In those 5900 days I learned how to walk, talk, and I became a strong young man without the provider of my Y Chromosome because he is nothing more to me than that.
The host mom Shellie was a single mom who had two of her own sons and two Russian daughters that she had adopted. The kids always had something warm to eat, and were always on their best behavior at home and in school. It would be fair to say that this was all due to Shellie’s upbringing. My room was on the first floor, right in front of Shellie’s hair salon, a small business that she ran out of her home. In the living room were six or seven huge amplifiers and a gigantic chandelier hung from the high ceiling. The kitchen had a bar. At first, the non-stop visits from strangers made me nervous, but soon I got used to them. I remember one night, a couple barged into my room while I was sleeping. It was awkward.
Now, I cherish the chance to act based on what I hear. Through teaching at Kumon and church and leading volunteer organizations, I’ve worked to develop and implement my style of listening to benefit others. Listening is a skill that I feel is often under appreciated in leadership. People usually flock to the figure in the center of the room, not the person on the side listening. But from my experience, it’s clear that I can guide others by harnessing my observations to benefit the inspirations and passions of those around me. My college plans are only avenues to further explore this ideology, as I’ll have the unique perspectives of thousands of other students, and professors to listen to.
The Rainbow Scholarship seeks to assist gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and intersex (GLBTI), college-bound teens with school expenses while increasing the positive visibility of queer youth and promoting awareness and acceptance in the community at large.There are three awards, ranging from $200 to $500; they are the LGBT Student of the Year Award, the Rainbow Award, and the Diversity Essay [...] More
The CBC Spouses Education Scholarship is for African-American or black students for all majors who are preparing to pursue or are currently pursuing an undergraduate or graduate degree full-time at a U.S. accredited college or university. A minimum 2.5 GPA is also required. Students must also exhibit leadership ability and participate in community service activities. For more information or to [...] More
Essay Prompt: The Rainbow Scholarship is awarded to a deserving LGBTQ student who aims to participate in a high-quality, rigorous education abroad program. If you would like to be considered, please explain why you would be a strong candidate for the Rainbow Scholarship. What will this scholarship enable you to achieve for yourself and your LGBTQ community?
List the educational & career goals. Begin with the current learning goals (why you attend specific college/university, the main reasons to choose the specific field and reasons to obtain financial support). Mention the long-term goals next. Write about the skills you plan to obtain during the study process, how they can be used to help the local community, ways to reciprocate the experience obtained from the society.
Sponsored by CME Group & the National Cattlemen's Foundation, ten (10) scholarships of $1,500 will be awarded to outstanding students who are pursuing careers in the beef industry. Fields of study may include education, communications, production, research or any other area involved with the beef industry. The purpose of this program is to identify and encourage talented and thoughtful students [...] More
Speaking of plagiarism, something to always keep in mind is that plagiarism can happen by accident. You might forget that you read something somewhere and write it into your essay, mistaking the idea for your own. Or you may not understand how much content you are allowed to quote in an essay. This free plagiarism checker allows you to either copy and paste your essay or upload the file directly to the tool. From there, it will analyze your essay and calculate a percentage of how much of your content is plagiarized.
The Megan Meier Foundation is seeking St. Charles high school seniors that have made a positive impact regarding issues of bullying and cyberbullying in their own school and community. Applicants must be currently enrolled as a full-time student, either within his or her high school or through an approved college program; reside in St. Charles County; have a minimum 3.0 GPA and passionately [...] More
Having a few extra pairs of eyes to read your essay is one of the best forms of college admission essay help. Ask your proofreaders to specifically look for grammar and spelling errors. Your assistants can also make suggestions on the content, such as identifying areas that need more detail or pointing out where you’ve written too much. Parents and teachers are good candidates for this task, but you can also make use of a college consultant for an experienced proofreader with specialized knowledge of the admissions process.